Write All Nite isn’t in the breaking-news business.

UNTIL TODAY. 

Only my devotion to moviegoing can convince me to flaunt my investigative skills (when you got it…I don’t got it).

So I visit Cinema 123 by Angelika consistently, especially on TICKET TUESDAYS (free membership! half price! sign up if you complain about expenses!), because Auditorium 1 is one my favorite regular houses in the city (with a respectful hat-tip to AMC Lincoln Square, Auditorium 2); there’s a documentary partially about the place for a reason!

Which is to say: I’m a frequent patron, and I cannot tell you how long its lone escalator has been on the fritz. Given the ultra-valuable land on which it sits — cut to: the decimation of UES theaters lately — Cinema 123 has been long-rumored to be on the chopping block, and the broken escalator stood as a reminder that the spot may have one foot out the door already; why invest money to fix on the way out?

WELL MOTHERFUCKERS, GUESS WHAT’S UP AND RUNNING ONCE MORE!!!

Granted, perhaps New York threatened to lay an inaccessibility fine on the joint, and it could swim with the fishies soon anyways.

But still, cause for hope!

Right?

RIGHT???

Please tell me I’m right.