This time around, we’ve got three shits and just as many covers:

So this song’s objectively trash, but here are because of some choice lyrics:

“Money long (money), but my dick longer

Say your pack strong (pack strong), but my pack stronger”

Need I say more?

This shit — country girl pop rock! — is extremely my shit. I mean, it’s shit. Mildly enjoyable shit, if you’re not into this sort of shit. But if you are, it’s the shit. But still, shit nonetheless. AKA, it’s a true delightmare!

OOOOOOOOOOOH AAAAAAAAAAAAH UUUUUUUUUUUUH

As much as I try to adhere to this list’s “no cover” rule, in what world was I not going to shoot Cher and Andy Garcia on an ABBA track straight into my fucking veins?

Another cover! Kind of. While obsessively listening to the Escape to Margaritaville soundtrack— my first real exposure to the dulcet pipes of Jimmy Buffet — I keep returning to the casual profundity of this diamond in the sand amidst his faithful (almost to a fault) fidelity to breezy jams. Careful readers with photographic memories could argue that this inclusion also forsakes my “no original scores” rule, but let me point you to loophole 55.22: Jukebox musicals aren’t original; HEYYOOOOOO!

Let’s make it a holy trinity of covers! In an album chock full of memorable remixes, Florence and the Machine’s is the only one that can stand toe-to-toe with the iconic original.

2018’s SHOOT IT STRAIGHT INTO MY FUCKING VEINS List

• Introduction
• January-February
• January-February, Part 2
• March-April
• May
• More May
• Five More for May
• June
• Kanye’s Hearts Beat Loud
• June is Busting Out All Over
• July
• Feminism
• August
• August Rush
• ()()
• (Do You Remember the 21st Night of) September…